Dear Tillman: What’s the Next Step?

DEAR TILLMAN: I am a sophomore this year at Hesston College, and am beginning the process of deciding where to attend school next year. However, I don’t much like thinking about it, because every time I do, the decision gets harder and harder to make. And I am no good at making decisions. The problem is this: I am from Kansas, and I have always wanted to go to Kansas State University where many of my high school friends are currently attending. However, during my time at Hesston, I have also made many great friendships. Friendships that are attending the KU next year, which another school that was on my radar. I am torn between the two decisions. My choice of a college has turned into deciding which set of friends I like more.

Man who can’t make up his mind

DEAR MAN WHO CAN’T MAKE UP HIS MIND: Choosing a college has always and will always be a tough decision for nearly every person. But when the added layer of friend groups is added atop it, it becomes a thick fruitcake of a problem. Choosing one friend over another to go to college with is like choosing a foot to sever off, and then running a marathon on the remaining foot. However, don’t fret! I’ve some ideas that may help you through your current predicament.

Try pretending you have no friends (but don’t stay in this space for too long, for it is a rather depressing place to be. Trust me…) Now without the added confusions of your friends, choose your college. Then enroll in weekend classes at the other college! This way, you don’t lose either friend group. It will however cost you quite a bit in gas money, or horse feed if you are still into the traditional methods of transportation.

You could also think about simply dropping out of higher education altogether. This is another very plausible option for not choosing one friend over the other. To stick with the aforementioned analogy, this option is sort of like cutting off both feet, and running the marathon in a wheelchair. And during your time off, may I suggest some time of silence and solitude in the monastery of the brothers of Taize in Burgundy France. They are more than hospitable hosts.

Hopefully these suggestions have helped you shine some light on this situation. Before I leave you, I have but one more piece of advice. I don’t mean to be a Debbie Downer when I say this, but just know, what you choose to pursue in you next year of life, you will regret. For the grass is always greener on the other side. But consider that good news, because by the law of Inversity, it means that you will also thoroughly enjoy things about whatever it is you choose! The important part is not so much the choice itself, but in that you actively choose for yourself. You path may be as crooked as a dog’s hind leg, but if you keep moving forward, you will get somewhere. Keep moving, because no one ever finished a marathon by standing still.

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